Sunday, October 29, 2006

So happy....

Hi everyone,

I just wanted to write a quick post to say how happy I am right now.
My life is in such a perfect place. I'm doing well finacially and work wise. I have my two wonderful kitties who are as happy as can be, they are playing together at this very moment.
I have lots of friends who love me, some of whom are even very bad influences and keep passing beers and that bottle of cheap wine/ fortified koolaid we found, into my hand at 2 am, but then insisted I sleep over as there is no possible way they would let me leave let alone drive (Chad!!!! You bastard for the bad influence but thanks for 'forcing' me to stay over, see I said after a while I'd come out my shell and start calling you names along with everyone else, tee hee).
I have a great home all to myself that is decorated just for me. I don't have to worry about anyone else.
I was even woken up this morning by a rather large basset hound licking my face. "Chester!!!Ewwww"
It's awesome to have friends that when I say "I'm moving" don't groan but instead ask me what time I want them over to help before I even ask.

It's really nice to be able to come home when I want and not have to call. Or bring home whoever I want and not have to wonder if your 'other half' will be awake or not.
I know this being alone thing won't last for much longer, but I'm enjoying it while I can.

So to all of you were were worried about me, don't be. I'm doing fantastic. I really hit the ground running. That's the kind of person I am, I never do anything half-assed. So I know there's proably a lot of people wondering how I got over my engagement so fast, well I didn't really see any point in dwelling on it and getting upset and stressed about it, I did enough crying when it was falling apart before so I had basically been going through the motions the last few months anyways so it's pretty easy to get over someone you said goodbye to almost a year earlyer. With that said. I'm vowing to not mention my ex again on here, it's not worth it. I've moved on, in more ways than I can share right now. Tee hee.

So I hope everyone out there is doing well, and to all those Calgarians reading this, doesn't this snow suck?!?!?!?!
Here's hoping you all have a nice warm bed to snuggle in to. Occupied or not, tee hee.
Kisses, Ev

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Lippy HNT

Well, I'm back.
This is an art project I'm doing to go up in my brand new bathroom. I'm decorating the whole place a little different, so these follow that. Hope you like.

Sunday, October 22, 2006

What Greek Goddess are you...

This is what came up for me with the male version of the quiz...

Not quite sure what that says about me. Tee hee

Will it ever end?

I had an oh so lovely conversation with my ex today. (Yes, Neil I know you're reading this, as you made it very clear and you've been reading my blog and you think I've misrepresented you)

When will the fighting with him ever end?
I called him today and as always we got into a fight and called me petty and accused of cheating on him. For the record I have NEVER cheated on anyone, not even a kiss and have no intention of starting.
I've decided to swallow my pride and go pick up my $ and such that he owes me. It just bugs me so much that he would have the nerve to accuse me of going out and cheating on him. Especially with someone I only saw on a regular basis AFTER he broke it off with me, before that I only saw this guy for coffee once every 3 months or so, and that's all it was, coffee, and it was during work hours too, not even a chance to actually do anything. Needless to say he was very respectfull of me being in a relationship and wouldn't even think of crossing that line.

Yes, I'm still very angry at Neil, but not angry enough to do what he says I was doing.

It's actually kinda ironic, I had a long conversation the other night with a close friend's brother who is currently going through a divorce and from talking to him I've come to see that not being with Neil really is for the best, we were really in different places. To be quite blunt I prefered to go to a play and he prefered to go to a movie. Neither is better or worse than the other, just different.

I just wish all of this will end. I want to be done with it all.

Saturday, October 21, 2006


- Jack Johnson

Based on your smile
I'm betting all of this might be over soon
but youre bound to win
because if I'm betting against you, I think I'd rather lose

but this is all that I have, so please
take whats left of this heart, and use
please use only what you really need
you know I only have so little, so please
mend your broken heart and leave

I know its not your style
and I can tell by the way that you move its real real soon
but I'm on your side
and I dont want to be your regret, I'd rather be your cocoon

but this is all that you have, so please
let me take whats left of your heart, and I will use
I swear I'll use only what I need
I know you only have so little, so please
let me mend my broken heart

you said this was all you have
and its all I need
but blah blah blah
because it fell apart
I guess its all you knew
and all I had
but now we have
only confused hearts
I guess all we have
is really all we need

so please
lets take these broken hearts, and use
lets use only what we really need
you know we only have so little, so please
take these broken hearts and leave

Something I hadn't expected

Hi everyone,

Well as life would have it I've come across something I'm not 100% sure how to deal with. Neil's friends have started calling me to see how I'm doing. I guess that's something that happens when they see us as a unit and more often than not they would see me as the one woman in their lives they could ask girl advice and flirt with without fear of getting smacked. I'm just really not sure what to say to them. I have yet to call anyone back, I prefer to let messages stack up until I know what to say.
- Do I start from the begining and tell them about the affair? After all there were some people who actually met this woman. (Just a little FYI, I will never say her name on her as she's a quite well known blogger, especially within the HNT circle and as much as I want to string her up by her toenails, she deserves more respect than for me to badmouth her on here)

- I guess the biggest question is, do I tell his guy friends the comment he made that made it so that I'd finally had enough? you know the 'I only proposed...' comment.

See I'm pretty sure his friends saw us the same way my friends saw us, so i'm worried that if I share all the crap that lead to our demise than he will lose all his friends and I don't want to do that to him. Afterall there are already enough people on my side who have said very clearly that they had better not run into him in a dark alley amd I'm not looking to recruit more.

So if anyone has any insight, let me know. My original play was to not have any contact with those who still have contact with him, but I'd never intended them to call me.

Let me know,

Monday, October 16, 2006


I awoke this morning to the the city covered in a blanket of white snow. UGGGG I hope it goes away soon as I have to move in a couple of weeks and really don't want to be doing it in the snow.

Saturday, October 14, 2006

Don't worry

Thanks for the comments guys, don't worry I still love men very much I just need to find the right ones.
But thank you.

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Moving on up....

Hey everyone,

Now for a VERY HAPPY, VERY EXCITED post!!!!!

I got my very first full page, full colour ad in the Calgary Herald!!!!! For those of you who don't live in Calgary it's our largest circulating daily paper. And to top it off it's on the back page of the front section. So the best possible place. And I designed it!!!

Ironically I think I'm more excited than when I used to actually write for the paper. For those of you who don't know I was actually a lifestyles journalist for another daily here in Calgary in my former life before I decided to go into advertising. I had a regular column in the Calgary Sun.

So needless to say my new job is going swimmingly.

The second part of my news is that I'm moving to my own apartment very soon. I've found a place, put down the deposit and just need to move in. I think I might be moving in the next few days as it'll be a great way for me to start everything anew. I'll post pics after I get settled so it might be a few weeks.

It's just so nice to be changing so many things. New place, new job, I'm going to leave my car with my parents as I'll be living near transit, so I'll have more $, potentially new guy....?, tee hee. I'm not telling. All I can say is stay posted as there's some big exciting stuff in the works. Dun dun dun...what pretell could it be? lol You'll just have to wait and see.

Well I'm late for yoga, so I'll chat with you all later.
Kisses, Ev

Friday, October 06, 2006

Thoughts and revelations

I've been doing a lot of thinking this last week.
I still have a lot of anger and hurt in my heart, but because I'm wanting to begin a new chapter in my life I want to heal my heart and cut through the anger and become a more loving, caring person.
I've found that writing my pain down on here for the world to see has been really theraputic for me. It must be the fact that I spent many years as a professional journalist, I'm used to the world reading my inner thoughts. I think it's also the closeness I feel to those who read my blog and the love I feel when you share your stories with me.

I've decided to write a list of the things that have caused me anger and pain in the last year in an attempt to free them from my keeping...

- When he cheated on me
- When they both tried to hide it from me
- When it was all said and done and I'd delt with it he told her I was still keeping him from talking to her, when I had actually become so numb that I didn't care
- When I realised that he misses the cat more than me
- When he stopped wanting to make love to me and would rather be with our other partner
- When he expected me to support him finacially
- When he'd try to convince me I was mentally ill as a way to explain my being oppinionated and emotional
- When he told me his family all hated me

And the one thing I did to free myself.... Move out while he was at work the day after he told me he only proposed to make her jelous.
I deserve so much more. I deserve to be free. I'm getting there. I'm a strong woman.

Also due to the overwhelming response from my HNT, i thought I'd post more pics of me with long hair. Enjoy.